Positieve affirmaties

Setting and maintaining boundaries with the Law of Attraction

Going through life with a positive mindset sometimes comes quite a few obstacles in certain situations. I noticed that maintaining your own boundaries can be very difficult when you’re trying to keep a deliberate positive mindset. And it’s not just a problem I’m experiencing myself, but also for a lot of people I know. Because, when you have decided you are going to think positive always from now on, because you are aware of the fact you attract what you think, you can never be unfriendly or self-centered. But sometimes, you just really need to be a bit unfriendly and self-centered. Sometimes you need to be tough with others to make sure to prevent them from crossing your boundaries and to make sure their bad energy stays with them and not with you. Otherwise, you keep feeling agitated, which then becomes a vicious cycle and before you know it, you will attract more situations with other people crossing your boundaries.

When you catch yourself complaining, because someone else keeps on doing the same thing that makes you to feel uncomfortable, you know you’re actually allowing the other to cross your boundaries. And maybe you’ve already talked to this person, but apparently your message wasn’t clear enough for this person to take it seriously. So, something went wrong. You’ve probably learned in life that when someone is crossing your boundary and you already told this person, it’s bothering you, but the situation keeps occurring, the problem is on the receiving side. He just doesn’t want to listen to me! But I think, that by applying the Law of Attraction, you can influence the situation more than you might think. You can now either choose to accept the situation and the bad energy that comes with it (which brings loads of negative energy in your system and it will limit yourself), or you now choose to take back control over your feelings and energy.

I personally believe we are here to learn. I believe that there is always a theme in your life that comes with matching situations that keep recurring until you do something about it. A situation that keeps on repeating itself in different forms. And I am convinced a problem that is connected to your theme will only be solved, when you’ve really solved this issue with your inner self. If you’re reading this blog it might be that setting boundaries and learning to take back control over your energy is the subject of your current learning project. With this blog, I hope to help you a little forward again in your process and so you will be able to remove these energy blockages soon! Because you need this energy to manifest the things you do want, so it will flow again.

Oftentimes we accept unacceptable behavior of others because ‘they don’t really mean it like that’, or because you’re afraid it will disturb the relationship, because it’s a family-thing or work-related and you see this person on a daily basis. But when this means that the other person can do whatever he/she wants, while the positive energy you’re meditating so hard for, directly vanishes into thin air, something goes incredibly wrong. Instead of putting the blame on the other, first you need to realize this is something you are allowing this yourself. First, it’s time to go inside and to find out what it is you are unconsciously sending out to the other, which makes the other person to believe it’s acceptable to act like this around you. We teach others what they can expect from us by what we’re sending out and by what we’re really thinking about ourselves. When you accept when others cross your boundaries, it might have something to do with your own insecurities and feelings of self-worth. Somehow you feel it is your job to please others, even if it makes you unhappy and uncomfortable. So take a look inside and try to find what’s causing this and work on this issue.

Of course you can address your ‘boundary crosser’, but if you don’t work on the reason why you attract this behavior in the first place, you will come across similar situations again and again in the future.

There are other ways you can make sure others won’t cross your boundaries, without giving up on your positive energy. Here are some examples:

  • Write down a list of affirmations that give you strength in this situation and that will shift your focus to what you do want to attract from this person. How do you want this relationship to look like? How will this person treat you then? What does the world look like when your boundaries are respected. And a few suitable affirmations:
    • It’s okay to say no
    • I have the right to feel safe en respected
    • I’m responsible for my own happiness
    • The happiness of others is not my responsibility
    • I have the right to choose my own lifestyle
    • I have the right to express my opinions, needs and feelings
    • I give myself permission to be who I am
    • I am enough
    • I only attract people who respect me
    • I only attract loving relationships
    • I am a human being and my feelings are okay
  • Sometimes it can be necessary to talk to the person himself and to make clear (once again) that his behavior makes you feel uncomfortable. Make clear you don’t accept this behavior anymore and that you will keep your distance when he still doesn’t respect your boundaries in the future. Let the person know what you need, but don’t dwell upon the negativity. According to the Law of Attraction it’s good to express what you do want to receive and to put less focus on the things you don’t want to attract.
  • Sometimes we are stuck in a web of loyalty, which makes us to feel like we don’t have the right to set our own boundaries. But please bare in mind – especially when you’ve already expressed it several times – that just like the other thinks it’s okay to treat you this way, you also have the right to choose to not accept that any longer. Give yourself enough importance and don’t make yourself inferior to someone else.
  • I took my distance from people many times when I felt it was necessary. And in extreme cases this is what you need to do for yourself, to be able to keep your positive energy. When someone causes you to feel unhappy on a regular basis and you never leave this person with a smile on your face, it’s a clear signal from your inner self. Taking distance is not selfish, when the relationship only lowers your energy and brings you out of balance. And I don’t mean that when someone is complaining to you once, you should immediately distance yourself from this person and end the friendship, but when you notice you leave this person more often with a lower energy vibration than a higher vibration, distance might be a healthier option to consider.
  • Negative emotions are signals that try to tell you, you need to change the situation. You have the control over your own life. And eventually, everything is a choice, even accepting unacceptable behavior of others. We tend to fall into victim-mode and to believe there are no options in situations like this, but they are there. Search for them and you will find them!
  • According to the Law of Attraction we attract what we send out. That’s why it’s important to find your energy back as soon as possible and to remain focussed on the desired outcome of the situation. Don’t dwell on anger, sadness and melancholia because of what “the other person is doing to you”, because you will attract more of what you’re already feeling. The Law of Attraction assumes that you desire more of the emotion you are experiencing. So, let go of the situation when it’s possible and start doing things that make you feel good.
  • And remember, you’re experiencing with the outer world, is a reflection of your inner world. The moment you stop believing it is necessary to make compromises and to sacrifice yourself, it will immediately reflect in your physical experience with the outer world.

When you learn to set your boundaries, manifesting becomes a lot easier as well. You’ll notice that similar situations will occur less often when sticking up for yourself is not an obstacle any longer. Feelings of guilt while setting our boundaries are connected to your belief that your worth is connected to being responsible for the happiness of others. But, the moment you are able to let this limiting belief go, you’ll notice that this feeling of guilt will fade away in time. This will help you to stay in alignment much easier and to feel much more energised! And when you feel like this, you automatically attract more loving relationships.

Good luck!

Lots of love!

Angelica

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